(RNS) — On Wednesday, Jan. 28, Ran Gvili was finally laid to rest. The 24-year-old police special forces officer, who was killed on Oct. 7, 2023, was the final Israeli hostage returned from Hamas captivity in the Gaza Strip. His burial closed a chapter of anguish for his family, his country and Jews around the world.  

The day before Gvili’s funeral, in Jerusalem at the Combating Antisemitism Conference, hosted by Israel’s Ministry of Diaspora Affairs, Rabbi Yehoram Ulman, the founder of Chabad of Bondi and the father-in-law of the late-Rabbi Eli Schlager, who was murdered in the devastating Hanukkah attack at Bondi Beach, spoke about Jewish identity in an age of trauma.

What he said stopped me short. They should reshape how we approach Jewish identity in our time.

“If Jewish identity is built only on shared trauma,” Ulman said, “then we hand our children a burden and not a gift. No child wants to inherit an identity whose main feature is pain. When a child experiences Judaism as life-giving and joyful, then hatred loses its power and pride becomes our armor.” 

This truth cuts to the core of the time we are living in. Since the Oct. 7 terrorist attack two and a half years ago, young Jews have experienced virulent antisemitism on social platforms and on college campuses. Ulman’s message was clear: While we must confront antisemitism, we cannot allow ourselves to be reduced to victims, consumed by others’ hatred. We must write our own story with the 3,500 years of Jewish wisdom that we have behind us and not allow our adversaries power over our narrative. 

Judaism has never been only a response to persecution — though it provides comfort, strength and meaning during times of suffering. We do not celebrate Sukhot or Purim simply as “they tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat.” The brilliant Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks, the late chief rabbi of the Hebrew congregations of Great Britain and the Commonwealth, noted that Judaism is fundamentally “a faith of hope” — a tradition that insists the future can be better and that our mission is to shape history and not merely to survive it. Judaism doesn’t end with asking, “Why did this happen to us?” It begins with, “What then shall we do?” 

Our responsibility as Jews — in addition to healing the world and bringing holiness to daily life — is to share the beauty of our faith and our pride with our children. Yes, we must respond to antisemitic attacks and confront hatred wherever it appears. But defense without inspiration fails.  

Some young Jews are being drawn toward hostile and antisemitic voices who create compelling content. If all we offer in response is fear and victimhood, we will lose the next generation. We need to show how profound, joyful and life-affirming Judaism is. 

The Lubavitcher Rebbe understood this. He built a global movement around joy, purpose and the transformative power of Jewish practice. He sent young couples to the farthest corners of the earth to spread light. That model is what we need now. 

Recently, we at Aish marked the completion of a Torah scroll commissioned by the Erber family, written at the site of the Nova Festival massacre on Oct. 7, in memory of Ran Gvili. But we did not treat this as a monument to suffering. We celebrated it as a declaration of life, continuity and hope.

This was the lesson Rabbi Ulman offered through his grief. The hostages are home. The mourning continues. But now the responsibility is clear. We must return to the work of Judaism itself — teaching, celebrating and building a future in which Jewish pride is not a burden to be carried, but an inheritance our children are eager to claim. 

(Rabbi Steven Burg is the International CEO of Aish, a global Jewish educational movement. He formerly served as eastern director of the Simon Wiesenthal Center, where he oversaw the Museum of Tolerance in New York City. The views expressed in this commentary do not necessarily reflect those of Religion News Service.)